Don´t call me motherfucker, motherfucker!

That old title from the norweigan rockband Turbonegro is one of the best songtitles ever! It got that in-your-face-asshole-attitude I like. Just like I find movies with that attitude strangely attractive. Of course in real life I prefer that people are polite and that every human being is treated with care and respect (there are some exceptions to the rule here, I´m not Gandhi). In movies nevertheless, the nastier the merrier! I´m sick and tired of movies that wimp out and doesn´t take the opportunity to go all the way. Offensive? Repulsive? Blasphemous? I hope! Sometimes it’s easier to get some people’s attention if you give them a hard punch in the face. Figural speaking that is… anyone can beat my sorry ass any day of the year.

Let´s highlight some of the pictures that has gone all the way and made a long last impression on me!

1. The Exorcist is the only movie that makes me want to believe there is a God. The Exorcist was made when I was two years old, but it is still one of the most horrifying pieces of celluloid ever produced. William Friedkin approached the subject matter as a drama movie and did some really courageous choices in what to show the audience. I mean, the scene with the crucifix is still shocking and the overall atmosphere of the film is haunting and damn scary. And how many movies lets an 12-years old spew out romantic lines like “your mother sucks cocks in hell” and “ Let Jesus fuck you!” That kind of dialogue offends me as well when watching The Exorcist! An extra crucifix under the pillow for Max von Sydows brilliant portrayal of Father Merrin.

2. John Boorman wasn´t fooling around when making Deliverance in 1972. The first 45 minutes is a slow drama about four men on a fishing trip. Beautiful scenery, well written dialogue and good performances don´t give away what awaits them in the dark forest surrounding the creek. But when the terror starts, it never lets go until the credits roll. The “scream like a pig” scene is so utterly disturbing and realistically done that it´s no wonder that it´s a scene that most people remember from the film. Ned Betty really looks like his virginity is stolen from him, and his performance is outstandingly good. A grim reminder of that it is a beautiful world we live in, and that it´s the human race that has some serious fucked up problems. An extra banjo for the brilliant “dueling banjo” scene in the beginning.

3. Martyrs. A real showstopper! I was literary tongue-tied after watching this unflinching French movie. The best horror movie in years and it has one of the best female performances I´ve ever seen in a movie of this kind. Martyrs is totally remorseless and it really feels like someone has punched you in the face hard, time and time again while watching it. I don´t want to give away anything about this film. Cannot stress enough how much you need to see this one!

4. Guinea Pig 2 –Flower of flesh and blood is an old classic. The Japanese knows how to set the record straight with good taste. If it´s not eels up in women’s body cavities, humiliating candid camera shows, longhaired ghosts, cute schoolgirls or outrageous animated hentai, you know that you can always count on them in making extremely gory movies. Even though there has been a lot more violent movies produced since Guinea pig 2 came out, it is THE one that broke boundaries and made Charlie Sheen reach for the telephone and call the F.B.I . No plot, no story, just the dismembering of a young Japanese female lying on a table. Great special effects and a good alternative for watching either Pretty Woman or The Lion king.

5. Inside is another French movie and also a really disturbing one. The interesting thing about Inside is that it could easily been done without all the gore and blood, because as in the case with Martyrs, there is a good solid plot in the movie as well. But Inside also goes all the way and does also make you cringe in some of the scenes where the violence goes over the top. Solid performances and enough blood to fill up a bathtub.

6. Even though all the cannibal movies produce in the seventies in Italy was groundbreaking it surely is Cannibal Holocaust that takes the gold medal. It contains rapescenes, abortionscenes, scenes of animal mutilation, cannibalistic murders and some ad lib puking. Not only that, Cannibal Holocaust is also is a sharp comment on how far a documentary filmmaker can go to make a movie and especially the makers of mondomovies. Not the perfect movie for a date in other words. If your date is not into hardcore cannibal movies that is!

7. Irreversible is infamous for a grisly rape of the beautiful Monica Belluci that lingers on in one continuous take for about ten minutes. The scene with the fire extinguisher also makes an impact (to say the least). A movie that stays with you for a long time after you´ve seen it.

Thanks for the mammaries Mr. Meyer!

Russ Meyer… let me count the ways I love his movies: the knockers, the senseless violence, the boobs, the absurd humor, the breasts, the funky music, the massive gazongas and last not to forget THE TITS! His movies was like a mental booby-trap for most men who saw them, you didn´t expect a thing really and then BAM! The tits bitchslapped you in the face until you got that silly, goofy smile upon your face. And kept you come back begging for more!


I´m certainly not an expert on Russ Meyer, and have not seen all his body of work. That said, the movies I HAVE seen were for years sort of a guilty pleasure. Why that was, I don´t remember… perhaps ´cause I didn´t liked to acknowledge my sexual preferences? Nowadays I couldn´t care less.

I don´t remember how old I was when I first saw Supervixens, but it sure got me bitten by the Meyer-bug. Big time. Double D time! Mr. Meyer had a background as a photographer and became the author, the Ingmar Bergman, the Fellini, of sexploitation cinema. Mr. Meyer shot the films, edited them, directed them and wrote the scripts. His love for the trade was apparent, and his love for big women even more so. Another really cool thing about him was that he actually owned his own movies, and took care of much of the business by himself. Even until his last days he was dedicated to the art of showing the bodies of women to the world. For that we thank him!


From the early success of the softcore The immoral Mr. Teas to his last motion picture Beneath the valley of the Ultravixens, he archived an original and personal style that influenced a lot of other independent directors (and many, many dirty minds). Of course his work was not considered as art by the critics (even though famous Roger Ebert co-wrote with some scripts with Meyer), but as many filmmakers with a mission, the critics was never his target. The fans who loved movies and big breasts were the main public. He did not disappoint us.

Faster pussycat, kill, kill was his first big break. A tale about three sexy strippers who are not at all innocent kittens, but rather vicious cougars who don´t think twice about kidnapping or even murder. Although not filled with naked ladies, Faster pussycat, kill, kill was cast with sexy clothed women. Second best so to say.

My favorite of Meyers earlier film is Mondo Topless. Topless girls like Babette Bardot, Darlene Grey and Sin Lenee dance to funky sixties music the entire film though. No plot, all fun!

Then came Beyond the valley of the dolls. It was written by Roger Ebert and the story involves a girl rockgroup that has just moved to Los Angeles. They are looking for the big break into the business, but ends up meeting some really strange and dishonest people along the way. Not a fun trip down the road of sucess in other words and while some sexy lebian scenes does steam the movie up, it´s the more darker aspects of sex, drugs and rock ´n roll. We like it anyway!

Roger Ebert went back to the typewriter with Russ and wrote Up! Adolf Schwart (look a lot like some german dictator with the same surname) gets killed off and a sort of “who-dunnit” starts. But it is of course just an excuse for some absurd humor and to show off some of the female actors impressive chests! Who needs a plot anyway when Kitten Natividad, Raven de la Croix and Linda Sue Ragsdale gets in frame? I don´t.

Supervixens is the film that that really has that perfect “Russ Meyer” feel to it. The plot is a mixture of humor, surrealistic bits and pieces and some violence sprinkled over it. The murderous cop Harry Sledge (brilliantly played by Charles Napier) has murdered Clint Ramseys wife and does his best to frame Clint for it. Ramsey flees from his job and meets with big breasted women after the other on his way to freedom.

Uschi Digard

“Swedish” Uschi Digard (and an extra plus for Uschi as a Swedish telephone operator), Shari Eubank and Christy Hartburg are the gals with the “largest” roles. Easily my favorite Meyermovie!

As is Beneath the valley of the ultravixens my other favorite Meyer-movie… hmmm… but I CAN have two favorites come to think of it. Tits come in pairs, so I guess Meyer favorites can as well! For being written by one of Americas famous movie critics, Beneath the valley of the ultravixens has a really whimsy story. The essence of the plot is about a couple who has sexual problems (the husband wants to use number two, and not the entrance with the carpet). Even though the story is paperthin the movie really works as a sex-comedy with lots, LOTS, of sexual innuendos. Sort of a “hardcore” softcore movie if you get my point. It´s a really “jolly” and jovial movie and marked an endpoint for Meyer as director for feature movies sadly enough.

There is not a single filmmaker before (or after) the rise of Russ Meyer that has successfully exploited the female curvaceous body as respectfully and as charming as he did. The critics complain that he exploited the girls and that his movies were demeaning towards women. I beg to differ. Mainly because Meyer did movies about women he loved. What´s wrong about that? Nothing at all. His love for big women might annoy a lot of people, but in those days it was all natural! No silicone pumped breasts, but women who had got a bonus at their chest. Environmental friendly breasts!


Russ Meyer passed on to the land of breastmilk and honey in 2002, at the impressive age of 82. I´m sure his healthy life philosophy “I always had a tremendous interest in big tits” helped him get that old.

On a personal note and sort of question to you who reads this!

I´ve said it before, but I´ll say it again. The strange and the bizarre have a certain appeal for a lot of people. It may be car accidents, horror movies, s/m-sex, extreme body modification, real murders on the internet or just the old "stuffing-a-flower-up-the-butt-routine". Why? It has to be something in the human nature that just wants to experience something out of the ordinary. Whatever THAT is?

When I was a kid, we challenged each other with watching the opening to Lucio Fulci´s The Beyond (I went home and never watched it at the time. Chicken, I know…) whereas today it´s chechclear or other brutal beheadings that are being shown around. Am I getting to old for this shit or is it something disturbingly wrong in watching real life murders?

As a freakvent (pun intended) surfer on the electronic highways, I´ve stopped at some brutal forums where there are nothing to burlesque to be shown. Everything is real and presented in flinching detail and for the most of the time in gruesome color. I don´t really know why I look at it, hell, I don´t want to know why either. Most of the time I feel sickened of the images, but before you can spell Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious I´m back and what do you know? I look at them again.

My initial road to the authentic material is crooked. I love special effects. All the old F/X masters like; Dick Smith, Tom Savini, Rob Bottin, Mark Shoestrom, KNB FX group, Gianetto de Rossi, made many films worth seeing. The craftsmanship in the art of making pictures was the thing that spellbinded me. It was the illusion of horror that trapped me. I was insulted the times people asked if a snuffmovie wouldn´t be the greatest thing to watch! Why the hell would I want to see that? Then over the years, when I was studying Film arts I wrote an essay about mondomovies. A long and tedious task of watching hours of real footage mixed with a lot not-so-real footage. I did that because I had a real problem with the subject. Why look at authentic material where people get hurt or killed? Somewhere a along the way I got influenced as well. I guess the researcher in me got bitten by the mondobug real bad.

I live a quite normal life, have a family, have some very good friends and I have my mother stuffed up in the attic (that last thingy was a joke, I don´t have an attic). I´ve always had a certain attraction to the dark and obscure. And I don´t think that I´m special in that sense at all, I think all of you readers feel that strange attraction whisper in your ears sometimes. But all are not made equal in the eyes of the ancient God Yog-Sothoth and therefore a lot of people watch it for all the wrong reasons. Some to impress others, some because they get off on the subject matter, some because they are interested in the morbid and a whole lot of people who watches it just because it is there to be looked at. So, my question to you is: Why do YOU look at pictures and movies of real human suffering?